“I am damaged” is a phrase some people used to express their frustration after failed romantic relationships. However, when a person uses this phrase and actually believes it they set themselves up for failure, do they not? Let’s take a look at the alternatives.

I am Damaged or I have Learned

Are you damaged, or have you learned? Epictetus was born into slavery, yet he became one of the world’s greatest Stoic philosophers. Imagine all the excuses that he could’ve used to feel damaged. He never blamed himself for things that were out of his control. Epictetus knew that he was the one in control of his own responses. Hence, he never led a life of self loathing. Learning from your experiences make you powerful if you never let yourself become a victim.

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The Powerless

Sometimes I don’t know if someone is trying to insult my intelligence, or perhaps they are really that stupid to think they can convince me. Understand that a person can convince themselves of the most obnoxious concepts. Instead of responding, I pity them in silence. If a person actually wants to believe that they are powerless, then there is nothing we can do to convince them otherwise. Why waste our time with such a person? There is nothing to learn from them.

The Dark Rabbit Hole Of Self Loathing

People feel sorry for themselves in all different kinds of ways. Many of these people take issue with others based upon their own insecurities. This leads to them punishing themselves with depression. Instead of taking control of their own mind, emotions and feelings, they choose to feel powerless over their own choices. The only reason why their mind is in this dark pit in the first place is because they put it there!

I am Damaged

So, if someone tells you, “I am damaged” they are actually telling you they feel powerless. This will now be their crutch to abuse a relationship and if you are involved with them, they shall take you down to the deep dark pit where their mind resides. It does not matter if you have all the love in the world for such a person, they will destroy you if you accept their mindset.


You can only help empower someone that wants to be empowered. There is a saying that states, “Birds of a feather, flock together”. That being said, it is important for you to surround yourself with positive people with positive mindsets.

“There is only one way to happiness and that is to cease worrying about things which are beyond the power or our will.” – Epictetus

Published by Maximus McCullough

Computer programmer, nature boy, musician, Alpha Male and Stoic Philosopher rolled into one. Happiness is my goal and inspiration is how I plan to get there.

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